How to help your child deal with being angry
As an adult it seems that being angry about something, often nothing particularly life-changing or important, is okay. Yet, when it comes to our children, those around us who are still trying to learn more about their emotions, we don’t have the same level of understanding.
Children are expected to behave themselves as much as they can and when they are feeling angry about something then it is asked of them to squash down those feelings rather than trying to recognise and tackle them.
Rather than simply asking the child to calm down and then punishing them if it doesn’t happen, why not learn more about how to help your child to actually deal with being angry? Want to know more? Check out some of our top tips that you can try out for yourself.
Recognise that every child is different
It can be all too easy to think that every single child out their approaches and deals with anger in the same way. Sure, there are going to be some similarities in their reactions, however, every single child is different. Some children will become much quieter and self-criticising when they are angry, some will lash out, shout, scream even try to hit and blame everyone else rather than themselves.
When you remind yourself that every child is different, then you can start to figure out the best ways to help that particular child.
Help them to describe and label their feelings
It is one thing for you to be able to recognise that your child is getting angry, but it is quite another helping them to recognise those feelings. A younger child is going to find it particularly hard to be able to describe and label their feelings, as well as what has caused them. Which means that it is down to you to help them. Find out a way that can help them to tell you what they are feeling that works for them.
Try and soothe them
In some circumstances an angry child is going to need to be left alone to work through their feelings, but equally it can be the case that the child is going to need someone to help them to get where they need to be. Feeling angry can be overwhelming and scary too, which means that you are going to need to do your best to soothe them. It is your aim to be patient and calm, finding an approach that brings down their emotions and gets them back to a place whereby they can sit and talk through how they are feeling. All without making them feel that they have to bottle up their feelings.
Remind them that there are consequences for being angry
Whilst you do want to ensure that your child is calmed down and feeling soothed, this doesn’t mean that they shouldn’t be told what their behaviour means for them. It is important that they know that whilst it is okay for them to feel the way that they feel, this doesn’t mean that they can do what they want or take it out on others around them.
Trying out these things can help you to work with your child to ensure that they feel supported and listened to when they are angry. However, the last thing that you should always keep in mind is that if you are worried about your child and how they are feeling, then there is no shame in asking for help.